Over the past two weeks, amazing leaders across the country have “explained” to me why they are unhappy and wanting to make a change…and cannot.
Here’s examples of what they said:
- I’m just spinning my wheels. I’m stuck. I can’t get a break. It’s just one thing after another. My job is terrible. I keep making mistakes. I feel like an imposter, I don’t really know what I’m doing. My board/boss/co-workers don’t value me.
Here’s what they said when I asked why they haven’t yet made a change:
- It’s just the way it is in my industry. I don’t yet have the qualifications to get hired for the job I really want. I can’t quit, and there aren’t any better opportunities out there right now. Maybe my situation isn’t really that bad. Employers aren’t hiring right now. I haven’t had time to re-do my resume. Maybe I just need to suck it up and try harder. I don’t know what I even want to do next. What I want is just not possible.
Okay… but where does that LEAVE you? Does it mean that if you are miserable, and you have to stay miserable?
NO! and here’s why:
When you are showing up fully, feeling JOY, BE-ing you, you create ripples of impact. This is, in fact, how I have come to define purpose: “Purpose is the intersection of the impact we have on others when we are feeling joy. The sweet spot.”
Therefore, not only does the world need you to be showing up fully and joyfully – it is your responsibility… Every single day. No matter what.
How? That’s what I coach. If you find yourself wanting to make a change, complaining and miserable about how bad things are, and still not taking action, please know that you are not alone and I fully understand.
Here’s three prompts to help you start revealing more data on your current situation:
1. Reveal a different TRUTH (that is always present). Look back at your day, week, month. What were the moments when someone thanked you for doing something? Try to remember how you felt in the moment that they were thanking you for. When were the other moments you felt good? Value these moments and describe in detail! Make a list of all the ways you have/are helping to move the needle (despite everything). I am not asking you to put a positive spin on a bad situation, I am inviting you to simply gather data on your impact in order to build momentum in those areas.
2. Test your assumptions about what is and is not true and/or possible. What do you believe is holding you back from living in your dream scenario (in your current or future role)? Take a minute to make a list of all the assumptions that you believe to be facts, and then ask yourself: “Says who?!” “What if it IS possible? What if I CAN…? What if my assumption is wrong, and the opposite is true?”
3. What did you reveal? Let me know! Did you notice any resistance? It can be challenging and feel unsettling to shift the “story” in our heads about our current situation.
If you ever find yourself at a Crossroad Moment, please don’t stay stuck. Look for your impact, look for your joy. Build upon that. Help others do the same. Together we are creating a movement of people living in the wonderful intersection of impact and joy!
To your success!