“The truth is: Belonging starts with self-acceptance.
Your level of belonging, in fact, can never be greater than your level of self-acceptance, because believing that you’re enough is what gives you the courage to be authentic, vulnerable and imperfect.” – Brene Brown
It’s more than imposter syndrome.
So much time can be wasted each day thinking that we are less than. So many opportunities to have our impact are lost because we take ourselves out of the running, out of the very situations where we are needed, as we convince ourselves that we need more [fill in the blank] first. So much energy is often expended trying to prove (to ourselves) that we do belong; often with a chip on our shoulder, or other barrier-creating behaviors.
Stop it! 😊
A number of years ago I was leading a small group Career (Life!) Breakthrough Intensive. In vulnerability, eight extraordinary leaders turned on their zoom screens and introduced themselves to each other, and we began to set the groundwork for the weekend. Within 15 minutes of the end of this initial gathering, all eight women either texted, emailed or called me – saying a version of the same thing: “Kathryn, the other women are amazing! Thank you so much for accepting me into this program – I know I’m not at the same level/don’t have the same success/aren’t as smart as everyone else… but will do my best to offer some value to the group.”
Think of that: everyone looking at the screen saw the others as extraordinary and felt like they themselves were an outlier. In the next session I shared what had happened, and breakthroughs occurred as each participant suddenly realized that if the other amazing leaders were seeing them as extraordinary, it meant that their own assumptions and beliefs about themselves simply couldn’t be true.
Can you imagine what it would feel like if you knew with certainty that:
- You belong at the table
- You are awesome
- You are enough
- You don’t need another degree/certificate/training/experience to get what you (really) want
- You have a unique superpower you use to help others
- When you show up fully, feeling joy, and as your quirky self, it is in those moments where you have the biggest impact on those around you
What would knowing all this mean? How would your days be different? How much time and energy would now be available to you to use elsewhere?
It’s true for you. I have the evidence. After helping hundreds of amazing leaders – of all ages, stages in their career, and backgrounds – reveal their purpose and curate lives of joy and meaning… it is always true.
When you KNOW those facts about yourself, it is only then that you can begin to ask and answer the real questions that help you be the expert on you, and thus create the possibility of living in your purpose with joy, ease and financial sustainability:
- When I’m feeling joy, what is the impact on others?
- What is my unique process for achieving that feeling of joy/having that impact on others – regardless of my situation, role, or profession?
- What if I could curate a career and life where I did that every day, and was paid in alignment with that impact? What would it look like?
- What if my truthful positioning and authentic voice helped the very people & organizations who need my help – find me?
I have lived this journey personally, and now teach the process of unlocking the foundational (and often missing) self-intel that is critical to curating our lives of joy and impact – and yes: thus effectively communicating one’s unique value in cover letters, resumes, interviews; having it inform big decisions on what to do (and when and how) in Next Chapters in a career, launching a new business, a website or establishing fees, and more.
Question: if you are seeking to curate a Next Chapter and were in one of my coaching groups, would YOU look around the ZOOM screen with the other amaing leaders and KNOW you belonged? (You do.)
To your success,
Next Chapter Coach
Creator of The Career (Life!) Breakthrough AcademyTM
P.S. – If you would like to join over 200 fellow leaders curating lives of impact & joy, check out The Career (Life!) Breakthrough Academy. This time of year can be challenging if you’re at a Crossroad Moment, trying to figure out what to do, what is possible, what you (really) want, and what you should do next. If this is YOU or someone you know, I’ve opened up times on my calender to get on the phone for a confidential call.